Insecurities of the second-born are no match for Him

Insecurities, I hate the word, yet I feel it labels me. Sometimes I feel I'm the only one in the world who has them, when I watch people go for their dreams, or speak their mindes with full confidence behind them, I wonder why can't that be me. Why do I have to be my own worst enemy? Always second guessing everything, making things more difficult then need be. Wanting others to like me, wondering why some don't? It's hard being a second-born child, they say we go completely opposite of our first-born brother and sister, it's like we're always a reflection of someone else, we can't even be our own, yes as a second child I would say that, we struggle with the what about me's, why did I go unnoticed or over looked for the job. Constantly wondering "what's wrong with me?" When you can be the most faithful one in your family, or a group of friends, but the louder one, or more "qualified one" gets noticed. We don't take credit when it's ours to claim. We "people please", usually at the cost of our own feelings. It's not easy being the second born, I often wonder what does that say about me, why did God put me in that place, the bible says His timing is perfect. So my position in life is just as He wanted. I guess He knew I could handle it, that I would love no matter what, that I would give even when I constantly get taken from, and I guess the down-side is the cost of sin. I hate that I have these feelings, that they are apart of me, but I'm real, this is real. My insecurities are not who I am, but they tend to take over sometime. I want so much more for myself, to be more, to know more, to accomplish more, to better at what I set out to do, but I tend to hold myself back, not knowing why, not even fully understanding what I really want, just more. To really feel content with who I am, even what I think are my bad traits, to see the good in them. I need to get a grip on why I am the way that I am, what use could I be? To see that being me, even with all my faults, can be made completely perfect by Him. It's amazing how quickly even by writing this all out, His peace has already come, letting me know, by Him and through Him, all things were made, and by Him and through Him nothing is impossible, and by Him and through Him, I am who He says I am. And to know my true reflection is of Him. I love even as I sit here and type these words on this page, His words have become louder, have spoken clearer and have already begin to change me. He's letting me see, that in everything He cares, and He hears, and He always gives us what we need.