Boys

I remember when I got pregnant with my first child, not even being married 2 months and the shock of finding out I was pregnant, was a little overwhelming, but so exciting in a way. I guess I love surprises, even when they are a little scary. I convinced myself it was a girl, let the record state that every female in my family had a girl first, so I just assumed it would be the same for me. I was convinced that I didn't like boys, please remember I was only 19, boys were gross, they were loud, and wild. I thought of a girls as perfect, sweet, and well mannered, I learned this was not always the case...just a few years down the road. I remember going to the doctor prepared to hear that I was having a little girl, but my husband hoping for a boy, well as most know, my husband hopes came true. I was a little disappointed, I wanted a girl, I didn't understand boys, but thankfully in every situation, God knows better, I learned that no matter what I say I want, God knows what I need. I often wonder how I even had those feeling, that are so foreign to me now, like those thoughts were from another person. I still remember going to the store to pick out stuff, for my new baby, and always liking the girl stuff way more, but those feelings all went away when I held my perfect little boy and he looked perfect with all the boy stuff. I wouldn't have it any other way.
Today I sit here, thinking about that time, and thanking God once again, for doing things his way and not my own. I try to remember the little lesson in this, as I have been blessed with 3 boys, along with my 2 wonderful girls, and today i'm filled with joy as I think of my boys. Yes they are gross, loud, and wild, but they are also sweet, loving, and full of character. They love me, in a way, my girls can not, they are perfectly and wonderfully made, and they reveal more of God's character to me everyday. They make my life more adventurous and exciting, they can make me laugh so hard tears poor out of my eyes, they make me feel like a kid again, as we play fighting with swords, and hide and go seek. They help fulfill a part of me, that needs this so much. They enjoy simple things, they teach me to enjoy the moments, and that I can also make cool gun noises with my mouth.
I pray that as they grow, I would keep learning from them, and allow them to be all boy, and not try to tame them as the world we live in does so often. I hope that in all things, I will always remember that God made them different than I am made, but it's a part of who He is, and to treasure this gift to better understand His character. I pray that I would always remember, the lesson, I have been given, in knowing that God always knows better than we do, and that I would thank Him for all I have been given.